Day 20

Soooo.  I am becoming more purposeful in how this journey is unfolding.  For me, right now, the devil is in the details.  I find that I NEED to slow down and process what I am doing, and that I have to let go of the sense of a "need for speed".  My work on my web site design is symptomatic of this process approach.  It is a labor of immersion, and then relaxing, moving away from, reflecting, emptying, re-approaching, immersion,... and it continues as the site takes shape.  It is an interesting process and one that I find myself counseling myself on to be patient and enjoy the ride.  I have to let go of "get ér done".  It's an interesting revelation and one that I'm still working to feel in sync with...meanwhile the work continues.

Day 19

I'm revisiting a photo, today that is near and dear to me.  I made a purposeful choice to put my daughter above all else and I have held to that promise for 21 years.  This past year I made a purposeful commitment to change, and reclaim the life I have had on hold.  I have been conceptualizing WHAT I want to do, and my first actual self focused step towards giving that dream legs was attending an AMAZING Write Yourelf Into Motion session with Alexandra Franzen and the "Athabasca 19".  I am still running on the "charge" I received through the guidance, Love, Celebration, and support that was packaged into an insightful and life changing experience.  I am eternally grateful for the "push" these DYNAMIC women have given me, and the encouragement they continue to give.  Ladies, I salute you and honor your journeys.  Thank you for helping me breath life into my future.  Love to you all!

Day 13

This Blog of 7,300 Moments in the Life of Betsy McDowell is an AMAZING work of mindfulness.  I am, after 13 days, PAINFULLY aware of my lack of mindfulness during my day.  I get to the end of my day and INEVITABLY say, "SHIT! I forgot to take a photo - except for the day that I went to lunch with Bailey. 

When I say, "this is how I roll." That's exaclty what happens, I roll...I don't pause...I don't reflect regularly...I don't act purposefully or mindfully, I just react.  I am a master of survival but not of purposeful living. 

WOW!  OK, so now that I have owned my challenge, I'm going to find a way to MOVE, INTENTIONALLY AND MINDFULLY in the direction I intend to go.  As I'm thinking...(see below)  I have this great watch that is a reminder of what I am committed to doing with my life...the watch has an alarm...it can be set to beep at intervals in the day...I'm going to set it to an interval beeping and I am OBLIGATED to take a picture when it beeps...let's see how that works.  Now, yes, I know that it's random, and not my ultimate goal, but in the the spirit of "What about Bob" (the movie) sometimes it's about baby steps.